something not political or coronavirus...

My wife tells me if I post something today, it should be entertaining and not so political, coronavirus, or just a downer in nature. 

Soooooooo....

This one was originally published in the Daily Pennsylvanian, my college newspaper, some time around 1978 or so.  I do not remember who wrote this.  He/she is an immortal in my opinion.  I may not get it exactly right, but so what?  I am now a senior citizen, eligible for social security, if the GOP does not ravage it (oops...).  When I finish with this, I am going to the kitchen.  My wife will tie a bib on me, and she will try to spoon feed oatmeal to me...

A cow is standing in a pasture, minding its own business, when a rabbit walks up to him and challenges him to a race to the fence on the other side of the pasture and back.  Knowing he cannot beat a rabbit in a footrace, the cow declines, but the rabbit persists (not unlike Elizabeth Warren, but then again, I digress...). 

"Mr. Cow, I am a good sport and I know you need something to make you feel better.  I will let you win the race".  With that, the cow and the rabbit take off.  Sure enough, they get to the fence on the other side of the pasture and the rabbit is letting the cow lead.  They turn around an head to the start/finish line.  Just before they get to it, the rabbit puts on a burst and finishes just ahead of the cow. 

Dismayed and utterly (I avoided saying udderly.  Oh wait, I just did...) heartbroken, the cow runs across the pasture where the old mare is munching on some hay.  Upon reaching the horse, the cow lets out his heart.

"Oh Ms. Horse.  The rabbit told me he would let me win a race from to the fence and back, but at the last moment, he ran past me!  He cheated!  He lied!  Just like the president (oops again...) I cannot believe he would do that to me!!!  What can I do?"

The mare looks up from her pile of hay, looks at the cow, and says...

"That's funny.  A talking cow"...

You're welcome.  I am ready for my oatmeal...