a test of willpower

When I brought forth this gift to the blogging world, one of the first things I said was I did not want this to become a space for political ranting all the time.  This having been said, the 24/7 comedy show coming out of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue has made it difficult to stay away from my plea into the ether for sanity.  I must, however, find some balance; therefore, I will use this post to see if I can put together at least two or three paragraphs without resorting to presidential bashing, especially now that I have already outright called for his impeachment and for him and his cronies to be tried for treason.  I mean, there really isn't much wiggle room for me after that, is there?

We therefore present a few words having nothing whatsoever with calling the president a fascist dictator, a megalomaniac, or a psychopath, other than in this sentence, as after all, this is my blog, and I just cannot help myself.  Come to think of it, I sort of bashed him in the previous paragraph as well.  I need meds.

One of the best things about living in the New York area is that there is no shortage of outlets for entertainment.  After all, there are the Knicks, who appear to be bent on being the only thing out there that can possibly outdumb the administration -- there, I did it again.  Well, they stood pat through the trade deadline, threw out some pablum about how they had the team they needed to win -- and then immediately released one of their front line players, saying he deserved to latch on with a winner.  The guys they clearly do not want on the team are still there.  Putting aside the fact that there is nobody out there who believes that anyone on this team deserves anything based upon the way they have played this year, one must believe that if this guy was so great they could have traded him and gotten something back in return, rather than just let him go for nothing.  Then again, "good for nothing" might as well be the team slogan this year.

Don't like sports?  Well, we do have our mayor, who is trying his darnedest to beat anyone in Washington to a comfy eight by ten room with very secure bars on the windows for the next three to five years, which would really be a feat.  The truly amazing thing about mayoral politics in New York after watching this guy for the last three years is that in a city of nearly nine million people, you would think that there is at least one person who not only thinks he has what it takes, but who would even be viewed at least one person not his or her mother as a credible candidate.  Nine million people.  Nine billion cockroaches.  We have just as many credible people running for mayor in New York as we have cockroaches.  Then again, most of the higher quality cockroaches have moved to Washington and joined the administration there.

Does that last line count against me?

Mayoralty politics not your thing?  Okay, we do have the best restaurants in the world.  Then again, the website www.eater.com does publish what it calls the New York Restaurant Scandals of the Year.  Kind of like a smorgasbord of who is going down next, just like which member of the cabinet will flee or be forced to resign, but paired with a really great cabernet.  Ok, the bottle and label are great.  The stuff inside is recycled from some bathtub on the lower east side.   Just like half of his cabinet.

I suppose we could just hop mass transit and take a tour of the City.  We do have hop on hop off buses, just like real cities in Europe.  Perhaps we could try mass transit and enjoy the fun and games of trying to avoid having a paranoid schizophrenic push us into the path of an oncoming train.  Or maybe I'll just take in a show.  Then again, going to a show these days means having to refinance my house.  Maybe I should just stay home, turn on the television to the Food Network, and pull the sheets up over my head.

Did I mention that the president sucks?

the smorgasbord president

So, we are now a month into it, and we have met the enemy, and it is...

Australia, Mexico, Sweden and the Press Corps, with the exception of the Fox Cheerleading Network, Breitbart News, Newsmax, and some guy standing on the corner of 42nd Street and 9th Avenue wearing a sandwich board advertising cheap massages while drinking something out of a brown paper bag, and yelling about how the government has planted some sort of chip in his brain.

Apparently, fearless leader gets his intel from the Fox Cheerleading Network, rather than doing something overly complicated like checking with his own intelligence agencies or maybe using that red phone on his desk to call somebody in charge in Sweden to ask what the heck is going on. Perhaps he could have even used that twitter account to ask for some feedback from the average Swede on the street. I am not sure what is worse, the fact that he is relying on a guest on Tucker Carlson's show who clearly has an agenda rather than the vast expertise of the intelligence agencies and the foreign service corps. or the fact that he is watching Tucker Carlson's show in the first place when he himself has said there was such a mess left to him that he has no time for anything else, unless you don't include partying at Mar-a-Lago and golfing every weekend.

Then he doubles down and tweets something about that lying media covering up that sad story about the streets turning into bloodbaths in Stockholm. I find it hard to conceive of how to cover up something that has never happened, but then again, I am not the president, a secret agent, or the janitor at the happyland factory. My wife has astutely observed that he tends to strike out at whomever he believes has dissed him at any given time; therefore, it is entirely possible that IKEA would not sell him the parts he needs to build his wall and this is his way of getting back at them. For all we know, RedState Nation is going to announce a boycott of all things IKEA and meatballs in the next day or two.

Well, look at the bright side. As a result of this, there has been a resurrection, reincarnation or whatever you want to call it of the Sesame Street Swedish Chef all over the internet, so in all, how bad could it be?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Q8o61kqFvA

Presidential Moronic Act of the Week, week ending February 18, 2017

If he ever gets impeached, comedians all over the world will immediately go into mourning.  The P-MAW nominations are being presented earlier than usual this week because I will be away most of the weekend attending to things that I actually enjoy doing and that have some real purpose and meaning.  As you can see, a shortened week cannot stop the mystical magical forces that bring forth the weekly P-MAWs.  There easily could have been a dozen nominations, as I suspect will be the case just about every week.

That being said, the P-MAW nominations for this week are:

1.  LOVE IS IN THE AIR

On the morning General Flynn retired/was fired/was hung on his own petard on the White House lawn, becoming what may be the earliest known forced resignation from a presidential administration in history, the GOP, who apparently could not find a way to spell "Benghazi" or "e-mail" using the letters in General Flynn's name or his resignation/letter of termination, were conspicuous in their silence.  The explanation for the silence, according to Maine GOP congressman Chris Collins, was that it was Valentine's Day, and all the GOP representatives were having a lover's breakfast with their wives.  Bakers of the world must have been having a field day, or at least the guys who pipe out the messages on the cakes.  After all, it must take a ton of icing and hours of intricate work to pipe "I am a disingenuous, hypocritical bastard" on a breakfast muffin, alongside the obligatory "darling, be my valentine".  Perhaps I should take Mr. Collins' word for, and figure I am in deep trouble for allowing my wife to go to work with nothing made for her but coffee before she left.  Maybe I should have bought a large bouquet of roses as well.

2.  LOVE IS IN THE AIR, PART TWO...

Apparently, there is something in the air, or maybe the water in D.C.  After that brilliant homage to the lovelorn from Rep. Curtis, there was a parade of GOP pols claiming they had not commented on the Flynn resignation and what it potentially means for the administration and the country because they were actually were celebrating Valentine's Day with their spouses.  As I type this, I am beginning to think that my wife is not going to view my repairing the screen door at the front entrance to the house instead of sweeping her off her feet to that intimate and loving plate of flapjacks at IHOP as being all that romantic especially since my expert repair lasted all of a day and a half.

3.  NOTHING TO SEE HERE

In their best impression of a nineteenth century bobby moving the crowd along, congress paraded out, when they weren't wooing their spouses with Valentine's Day sweet nothings, and announced there was no reason to investigate anything related to the Flynn firing/resignation/scapegoat of the month.  Apparently, endless inquiries into Benghazi and e-mails, some of which may continue -- remember, Jason Chafetz, the House of Representatives' answer to Sherlock Holmes, told us after the election that he was not going to back down just because Hillary lost the election -- dwarfs the integrity of elections in this country, and the potential that the legitimacy of the government is in question.  Rand Paul put the GOP position best, however, when he announced that the GOP should not be investigating the GOP, forever putting rest to that idiotic notion that the congressional majority should be looking out for the best interests of the country as a whole, rather than in protecting themselves.

4.  316 JEWISH ELECTORAL COLLEGE VOTES -- if it was not for what comes next, this would have been my choice

At the White House press conference with Benjamin Netanyahu on Wednesday, he was asked about the sharp rise in antisemitic incidents across the country since the election.  In response, he prattled on -- again -- about his electoral college victory, mentioning along the way that his daughter is married to a Jew, and they were both in attendance at the press conference.  There was a reference to his running again in 2020.  His apparent solution to antisemitism was to note in passing that "there's gonna be a whole lotta love".  I can picture Klansmen and Nazis across the country slapping their foreheads and wondering why they did not think of that.  All of this was done in front of the Israeli prime minister.  There was no condemnation of antisemitism.  There is no truth to the rumor that there were one and a half million people at the press conference.

5.  PRESSERAITION -- my choice for this week which could very well retire the P-MAWs forever or at least until his staff has another brain fart and allows him to speak contemporaneously in front of the press corps again.

Where to begin?  The whole thing was the "hot mess" he claims was left behind for him by the previous administration to clean up.  If this is his way of "cleaning up", I would recommend that he not seek a job as a maid at one of his hotels when this gig is up.  Let's see...   Russia is fake news. On a related note, I have no investments in Russia and owe nobody any money at all there -- pay no attention to the fact that my son has said we have billions of dollars wrapped up in various business projects there. The press is completely dishonest -- unless they fawn all over me like teeny boppers in front of Elvis.  The ninth circuit court of appeals gets reversed eighty percent of the time.  The obligatory, I got more electoral college votes than anyone since Reagan -- immediately debunked right in front of him.  And my personal favorite, when given the chance a second day in a row to decry rising acts of antisemitism, an absolute softball of a question any politician with a brain could have literally knocked out of several ballparks, he angrily claimed he is the least antisemitic, least racist person in the world, and told the questioner to sit down, as the question was insulting.  Once again, he did not condemn antisemitism.

Look, I know that in the grand scheme of things, whether or not he likes Jews may not be the biggest, baddest issue out there.  The President, however, is supposed to rise up above the threats to synagogues, the painting of swastikas on Jewish homes and businesses, the big nose caricatures, etc.  He's the one who is supposed to be out front condemning all of this on our behalf.  He's the one who is supposed to rally the better angels in our nature.  Instead, his failure to do one of the easiest things there is to do out there, take a softball question about the rise of hatred, and forcefully denounce that hatred and simply state that he will use the office of the presidency to fight antisemitism, racism, violence against the LGBTQ community, or any other group victimized by hate groups calls into question the character and integrity of the "least antisemitic, least racist person you know".  The question was not insulting.  The answer was.

Go forth my children and comment if you wish, but be vigilant at all times.  The P-MAWs wll be back.

A Birthday Tribute to Abe Lincoln from the President

It's Lincoln's birthday today, and we thought the president should somehow commemorate the day. Knowing he has a very busy schedule, what with adding up the tab for the shindig last night for the Japanese prime minister at Mar-a-Lago and all, we thought we could save him some time, and present a quick little note for him to use in honor of our sixteen president. no charge --

"So i notice that today is Abe Lincoln's 208th birthday. I've heard alot about Abe. Nnobody knows more about Abe than i do. Remember i am a really great real estate developer, the best, and nobody can build a development using the logs Lincoln developed better than i can. Just look around you, It's huge. It's really huge. The best. Trust me.

"Anyway, I recently visited a memorial they built for him in Washington, and made a speech there. It was the best speech ever. All the best words. All the best phrases. All put together like nobody had ever heard before. Millions showed up to watch it, but you will never hear that from the so-called mainstream media. Billions of my voters and fans were there, but they wont' show that either. All they want to show is all those people they paid to go to New Hampshire to vote illegally for Hillary. Fake news. Really sad.

"So Lincoln's done some really great things, and i think you will be hearing more and more about them in the future. He's really great, so I would urge you all to do something today to honor Abe -- he's a personal friend of mine -- and let him know we are thinking about him today, while supporting your local businesses, who are all really doing an amazing job letting him know he's the best.

"While Melania and I spend the day selling rooms at my world class resort in Riyadh, I would urge you all to go to the theater tonight,.."

The Presidential Moronic Act of the Week, Vol 1.

We are now three weeks into this abomination, and by now, most of us have already figured out, if we had not beforehand, that he has absolutely no business being the president, and no clue of what he is doing, other than using the position to try to enhance the family brand and make a few bucks off of it.  It took less than three weeks, but at this point, i have trump fatigue (there you have it.  I actually said his name.  At least I did not capitalize the first letter).  Frankly, it's why I have not posted anything new in more than a week.  I really did not want to make this blog a political thing, but he has proceeded as he has, and there you go.

At this point, I have no desire at all to post daily rants about every single thing he does.  I must confess that three weeks into this thing I am longing for just a single day when he does not say or do something stupid, or have somebody in his administration do it on his behalf, although I must admit that along these lines I find it utterly amazing that there are so many people out there who are willing to sell their souls, or simply have none in the first place, just to curry his favor.  So this being the starting point, rather than post and rant daily, unless there is something extra specially brainless, dimwitted, downright corrupt or whatever you want to call it, we hereby introduce:

The Presidential Moronic Act of the Week.

The Presidential Moronic Act of the Week, or P-MAW, does not have to be one the president himself said or committed.  It is sufficient if performed or stated by one of his sychophants.  There is no particular issue that counts more than any other.  It can even be a non-political statement or issue, as long as it is truly ghastly or hilarious, rising to such a level as to qualify as the P-MAW.  I do not claim to be all that brilliant myself, so I will simply list a few items of brilliance coming from the administration each week, and let you tell me which one wins.  I do reserve the right to let you know which one I would vote for.  After all, I am not above a fraudulent election result.  I am sure he will launch a really, really major investigation, to which all I can say is, SEE YOU IN COURT.

This being said, the nominations for the P-MAW for the week ending February 11, 2017 are, and yes, I know Saturday has not ended yet, so there is a chance, make that a substantial likelihood, that he or somebody in the administration may have a P-MAW worthy moment:

1.  NORDIE'S.

This one, if nothing else, gets an "A" for teamwork.  Nordstroms is not going to carry Ivanka's line of clothing and accessories this year.  So what?  Apparently, the brand is not doing all that well in the stores, and like any other retailer, Nordstrom's has made a business decision that they are not going to fill the shelves in the store with products that not only are not selling, but are a source of anger for a very large segment of their clientele.  This rather sensible business decision was met with tweets from daddy, a threat of boycott from people who never shopped there in the first place and may not even know where the closest Nordstrom's to them is located, a sales pitch from KellyAnne Conway on the Fox Cheerleading Network that most likely violated the law, and a statement from Sean Spicer, who can always be counted upon to be on this list in which he stated that the Nordstrom's decision was a direct and deliberate attack upon the president and his policies.  Notice that Ivanka has not said a word herself.

2.  GRIZZLY BEARS

Yes, I know this one did not originate this week, but how can you pass it up?  This is all the more apt considering that after her first day on the job, our Secretary of Education posted a light hearted tweet that, frankly, I had no problem with, ending with a light hearted, "where are the pencils?".  The outpouring of responses was vitriolic, but also humorous, my favorite being the ones claiming that all the grizzlies had stolen them.  Perhaps we should check with the Wapiti Valley School to see if the bears at least passed this week's math quiz.

3.  PIPE DREAMS

He claims that in approving both the Keystone and DAPL, he got no calls registering any sort of complaint.  It turns out he got no calls because the phone lines in the White House that register such complaints had been turned off.  It also brings to mind the question of whether or not he has looked at any video of the protesters at the DAPL site.  Then again, he probably figures this is fake news.

4.  IMPUGNING INTEGRITY

Who knew that reading a letter written by Coretta Scott King in 1986 would impugn the integrity of now Attorney General Jeff Sessions?  Apparently Mitch McConnell thought it would.  Then again, after banishing Elizabeth Warren for doing so, he allowed a male senator to finish reading the letter on the floor of the senate.  Perhaps he reconsidered whether or not banishing the reading of a letter written by the widow of Martin Luther King, Jr. on the floor of the senate was a good idea, or perhaps upon further reflection, Mr. McConnell realized that there are no senators left with any integrity to impugn.

5.  ELLIOT ABRAMS (hint -- this is my winner)

This one probably got the least amount of attention this week.  Many know that Elliot Abrams is a neo-conservative who served in the Reagan and Bush, Jr. administrations.  He had a bit of a reputation towards the end of being a war hawk.  You would think that would suit the president just fine; however, during the election, Mr. Abrams was highly critical of the mere possibility of a trump administration (there, I said his name again.  Just could not figure out  a spiffy way of how not to say his name here).  In the president's world, that is enough.  Rex Tillerson figured, probably correctly, that he needed somebody who had been there before and was a professional, to provide guidance to a State Department that has nobody in any position of authority with any foreign policy experience.  Somebody who could help apply the breaks to any really bad idea, like nuking Australia.  Abrams has that experience, even if many of us do not agree with him politically, but he said some very, very bad things about the president during the campaign, so nope.  He's out.  And we are left with amateur night at the "Y" running the State Department.  But at least he gets to continue to be surrounded by folks who will hoot and holler approval about anything he says or does.

Further nominations will be accepted and possibly discussed, especially if they amuse me.